Happy Birthday, Jamie Hubley

You know, 40 short days ago, I had no idea in the world who Jamie Hubley was.  In the days since then, however, his name, his voice, and even his spectacularly handsome image is known to people all around the globe.  On October 14th, Jamie ended his young life.  Being 15 years old and openly gay had its price as Jamie was yet another victim of homophobic bullying.  Being 15 years old, openly gay, enduring bullying, and having clinical depression on top of that proved to be too much weight to carry.  In his short time here, Jamie was already making a major impact on people's lives.  According to his father, in a recorded interview, Jamie just loved people and wanted to make a difference.  According to Jamie, in his now-defunct tumblr blog, "I just want to feel special to someone".  Today, the things he wished for and wanted are coming to fruition:  he is making a difference in people's lives around the globe; he is very special in the hearts of thousands and, perhaps, over a million people from that same geographic location.  To be sure, as of this day, I can still say I never "knew" him.  I can say, however that he has had a profound impact on my life.  See, Jamie Hubley is why you're reading this.  Jamie Hubley gave me my voice.  As a singer/songwriter by profession, and as a gay man by nature, I'd ALWAYS taken the issue of gay teen suicide very seriously.  I'd been trying to bring awareness to the issue for a couple decades.  I'd written about it in a few of my songs.  It wasn't enough.  I needed to get more deeply involved in helping to bring about change.  This very blog is in Jamie's honor.

Today, November 23rd, 2011 is Jamie's sweet 16th birthday.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, JAMIE!!!  You are loved by many.

SUPPORT RESOURCES

• SUPPORT RESOURCES (updated)

  This is a link to a wonderful page giving many different types of resources. http://www.feelingblue.org/resources#yspr
  
  

  • National Suicide Prevention Organizations
  • National Support Groups
  • Depression Resources
  • Youth Suicide Prevention Resources
  • Resources for Finding Facts and Figures
  • Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgendered Questioning Resources (GLBTQ)
  • Pennsylvania Resources
  • Survivor of Suicide Resources

  
  Feeling Blue Suicide Prevention Council is a community-based organization dedicated to preventing suicide, reducing the stigma associated with suicide, and supporting those people affected by depression or by the loss of a loved one to suicide. We do this through education and support.
  
  A couple more links have been added, so I wanted to post them here:
  
  COPING WITH SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
  This is a link for a downloadable PDF done by C.O.M.H. (Consortium for Organizations Mental Healthcare)
  
  http://www.comh.ca/publications/pages/cwst/
  
  HOPE AND HEALING AFTER SUICIDE
  A practical guide (download )for people who have lost someone to suicide in Ontario (adapted from Alberta but updated for Ontario)
  http://www.camh.net/News_events/Media_centre/hopehealing_publication.html
  
  
  
  Thanks, Barb (again!), for posting this.

Make a Note; Have a Plan

A couple things became obvious after last night's ordeal(s) (yes, there was a second one later in the evening): 1.) this truly is an epidemic.  Last night, in a period of 5 hours, three young people THAT WE KNOW OF attempted to take their own lives; one succeeded.  So, I guess it's safe to say that it served as a microcosm of society as a whole:  for all our efforts, we just couldn't get to them all; and, 2.) there needs to be a concrete plan in place for when this crisis reaches you.  And, trust me, at the rate of 1 suicide EVERY 18 MINUTES!, it's only a matter of time before it effects your life.  Map out your plan, now.  Make mental notes.  If it's pre-crisis, meaning no attempt has been made but the at-risk person is in a very fragile state, get professional help immediately.  If it's too late for that, if the attempt has already been made and every second counts, call the proper authorities immediately.  Every single second counts.  We're going to win this battle and cut significantly into the current statistics.  We can make a difference!!!

What Would You Do?

Last night, we had a crisis in my online community.  There were signs that a suicide attempt may be underway.  So, for the next several hours, several of us scrambled in an attempt to put something concrete together to present to the proper authorities.  After nearly three hours of intense information gathering and sharing, we were able to track down the at-risk person and get them to the hospital.  Safe and sound.

Once I was able to catch my breath, it made me sit and wonder what would you do?  How would you have handled a similar situation?  Would you believe that there was one young person who had the vital information we needed but wouldn't (COULDN'T) give it to us because their parents said "don't get involved with it, it isn't your business."  Saving a life, whether you know the person or not, should be EVERYBODY'S business.

A Suicide Note

A while back, my former songwriting partner contacted me to ask if I could "come up with something..." for him.  He had this title, and an idea of what he wanted the song to be written about.  And, he knew that it was a subject matter that was very dear to my heart.  Still is.

This is written as an actual suicide note.  I would greatly love to wipe out the need for any parent, any friend, and loved-one to ever have to read a similar in their lifetime.  Please pay close attention to the lyric of this song, then do EVERYTHING IN YOUR POWER to make sure no parent or loved-one has to endure reading a letter like this again.

Ever Wonder Where The Atmosphere of Hate Comes From?

We live in a very complex world. Our society has become deeply divided and polarized. And, people have become all too comfortable with spewing hatred and intolerance all in the name of God. Case in point is that church, you know the one I'm talking about, that, in the name of God(so they believe), goes around to funerals and high schools with extremely toxic, hateful, and purely evil signs stating how much God hates fags, how fags should burn in hell, and worse. Here's a deeper issue, and one that really merits looking into: these people have children, no doubt. So, what's the lesson learned by the children? That it's totally ok to hate as long as it's done in the name of God. That intolerance is fine as long as God is in the mix. And, you wonder why there are hate-filled bullies in the schools? Well, wonder no more.  Here's the eye-opener: one state just sanctioned bullying as long as....

What Is Depression?

Now, if you ask the average person what depression is, they'd probably have a very pedestrian response, like "when your boyfriend breaks up with you." To be sure, that can be quite depressing. However, it isn't depression. Clinical depression is an illness, and it's an illness that is at the root of the overwhelming majority of teen suicides, be they gay or straight. This article, posted by my good friend Maureen, will certainly explain better than I can.  Depression

My New Voice

Recent tragic events have served to give me, finally, my true voice. I've often written about gay teen suicide in my lyrics hoping, I guess, that someone, somewhere who was truly at risk would hear the songs and reconsider. Not enough. I took this particular suicide very personally even though if he were alive today, I wouldn't know him from the man in the moon. Doesn't matter. I know him now. He's directly and incredibly touched my life in a very deep way. To say "things will never be the same" is cliche at best, moot at the least. I can't say this any clearer or directly: I want gay teen (and, ANY teen!) suicide eradicated. And, I won't stop raising awareness...ever. That's my gift to you, Jamie Hubley, as a tribute to your life and as a thank you for giving me my voice.

Ron