Hating In The Name of God

So, you've seen the videos over the past few days of school administrators bullying students, unaware that their actions were about to be broadcasted worldwide.  It's well documented how, in some cases, the parents, themselves, are as responsible for their children's low self-esteem, and in some cases suicides, because of their intolerance and lack of acceptance.  But, to have a pastor, A MAN OF GOD, spew hatred towards, intolerance of, and utter lies about gays is absolutely unacceptable.
When you start to look at the bigger picture of what today's youth have to deal with as the struggle to find their place in this crazy world, it's quite easy indeed to see why we have so many emotionally damaged young people taking their own lives.  When they see and hear so many adults, people they look to for leadership and affirmation, from the homes to the schools to the churches, instead give them just the opposite.  Then, when the end result is another tragic loss, we shake our collective heads and wonder "why".

And You Thought It Was Just a Kid's Thing!

It's horrific enough that you have to be concerned about your son or daughter being bullied at school by their classmates.  We've already seen the damage that causes, and we are very well aware that it oft times is the major contributor to teen suicides.  And, we as adults have been preaching that they should report these bullying instances to their teachers and/or school administrators immediately.  Well, as I'm sure many of you saw just yesterday, it isn't JUST the kids who are doing the bullying as a teacher in New Jersey was caught on video verbally abusing (bullying) a special needs student.  That's unacceptable, right?  Of course it is, and we should be outraged.  But, if you think this is an isolated case...an anomoly, THINK AGAIN!!  See, this atmosphere of intolerance isn't a kid's thing; it's handed down to them from the very people who are entrusted to mold them into upstanding citizens.  It's taught in churches, in the homes and, as is evident here, in the schools.  If it's true that the young minds are like sponges, and it is, then why are we so careless as to what they're "soaking up"?

Every 18 Minutes

Ok, I've set my stopwatch.  It wouldn't make sense for you to set yours since it will take you less time to read this that it will for me to type it.  The fact I want to drive home is the there's a teen suicide every 18 minutes, statistically, in this country.  That's exactly 18 too many.  And, in most cases, bullying played a major role in it.  The time is now for every single person with an iota of compassion to start getting involved in order to bring this epidemic to a swift end.  Educate yourselves on the issue.  Educate your own children!  And, educate your friends.  The atmosphere of hate and intolerance comes from somewhere.  So, the best place to start attacking it, in order to eradicate it, is in the homes.  We can NO LONGER count on the schools and school administrators to do the job for us.  To be sure, in some cases, they're as culpable as the kids who do the bullying.  It is my belief, and I'm sure the belief of countless others, that the time is now to get involved (...just lost another teen to suicide).  Here's a helpful tool to help kickstart the education process.

It Takes a Village (Update)

The more I read, listen, and learn, the angrier I get.  Violence against the GLBT community is being sanctioned, and your loved ones are at risk!!  I told you in an earlier entry about the new law in Michigan that allows bullying of gays if it's done for religious reasons.  Wait!  Did I miss something?  So, Billy the jock can go beat the snot out of Jimmy the homecoming queen and, as long as he says Jimmy's being gay went against his religious beliefs, he's excused?  Oh, HELL NO!  It truly does take a village, and I'm a staunch believer in the power of numbers.  For the sake of your own children, be they gay, straight, or Martian, let's get this law reversed. Every voice counts!

11/17/2011:  Voices from around the world are being heard!!!  OVER 80,000 PEOPLE have signed this petition so far!!!  Let's keep it going.  Add your name to the growing list so that we can get rid of this evil bill. If you haven't signed yet, do it now. If you have, pass it along to someone who hasn't.

Rest In Peace Ashlynn Conner (she was 10 YEARS OLD!!!)

I'm reminded of a saying: "if nothing changes, nothing changes".  There is NO WAY a family of a 10 year old should be mourning and planning a funeral for their child BECAUSE OF BULLYING!  NO WAY!!  THIS has got to end!!  Where are such young kids learning to be so extraordinarily cruel?  The answer, far too often, is they learn it from home.  Teach your children well.  Rest in peace, young Ashlynn.

How Some Parents Drive Their Kids to Suicide (Updated)

I've been saying for too many years that there are parents in this country, and probably around the world, who drive their gay or lesbian sons or daughters to suicide.  And, to their defense, I will say that they don't even realize they're doing it until it's too late.  We as adults, young or old, already know how difficult the teen years can be.  The teasing, the bullying, the "trying to fit in", the sheer weight of peer pressure.  Toss into the ring the reality of being a gay or lesbian who is still figuring themselves out - or, for that matter, even the ones who are confident within themselves with their sexuality - which is almost certain to bring added pressure and tension.  Take all of that turmoil that they're already dealing with at school amongst their peers, add to it living in a household where they already know that gays and lesbians are not accepted, looked down upon, or (in some cases) vehemently hated.  That's a recipe for disaster.  It plays out in household across this country, and around the world, every single day.  Remember: every 18 minutes, a kid takes his own life.  That's an epidemic!  It's time we start changing the way we think in order to start saving some lives.  Even the strongest steel breaks under too much pressure.

UPDATE:
I thought it was fitting to add to this entry.  At this very moment, I'm also chatting with a simply delightful, highly intelligent, very handsome and sensitive young man.  Unfortunately, he also fights suicidal tendencies regularly.  And, at the root of that is a home where his family, his parents belittle him (at best) for who his is.  I spend as much time as needed, and as I can, talking to him.  It's paying off.  He IS doing better by the day.  However, this morning, his self-esteem took another punch to the gut as his own mother called him "...a fool" for being in love with someone from his own sex.  If only we could get these parents to understand the devastating affect some of their words have on their children, I'm sure the suicide rate amongst teens, gay and straight alike, would be drastically lower.  Here's the blog entry this young man made (his permission to reblog was granted) after being verbally assaulted by his own mother:

Heartbroken…

I feel like everyone is stalking at me… Pressured just anywhere I go… Finally when I’d try to get closer to someone I love from all my heart… someone will surely be there to break my least effort… and break my heart to tiny pieces…

Even my own family wants to take away from me what matters to me the most… Urging me not to have what my life is just all about… if that’s so then I don’t even need my life either :( 

Sometimes I just wish to run away and get the whole thing over with…

Only then comes school, where I’m, yet again, handled as a darts target, a trash can, a whatever… what does life worth like this? :(

A grateful thanks to the few beautiful people who reassure me from time to time… ily!

Pray for change.  Then work towards making it happen.

Even the strongest steel breaks under too much pressure.

SUPPORT RESOURCES

• SUPPORT RESOURCES (updated)

  This is a link to a wonderful page giving many different types of resources. http://www.feelingblue.org/resources#yspr
  
  

  • National Suicide Prevention Organizations
  • National Support Groups
  • Depression Resources
  • Youth Suicide Prevention Resources
  • Resources for Finding Facts and Figures
  • Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgendered Questioning Resources (GLBTQ)
  • Pennsylvania Resources
  • Survivor of Suicide Resources

  
  Feeling Blue Suicide Prevention Council is a community-based organization dedicated to preventing suicide, reducing the stigma associated with suicide, and supporting those people affected by depression or by the loss of a loved one to suicide. We do this through education and support.
  
  A couple more links have been added, so I wanted to post them here:
  
  COPING WITH SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
  This is a link for a downloadable PDF done by C.O.M.H. (Consortium for Organizations Mental Healthcare)
  
  http://www.comh.ca/publications/pages/cwst/
  
  HOPE AND HEALING AFTER SUICIDE
  A practical guide (download )for people who have lost someone to suicide in Ontario (adapted from Alberta but updated for Ontario)
  http://www.camh.net/News_events/Media_centre/hopehealing_publication.html
  
  
  
  Thanks, Barb (again!), for posting this.